‘One Tree Hill’ Recap: Every Breath Is a Bomb

9x09

(this recap is a re-posting from 3/7/12)

YOU GUYS!!!!! After today, I only get to say “Happy OTH Wednesday!” 4 more times!!! Can you even believe it? Do you think we could get a group therapy discount when it’s all over? Admit it, you’ll need it just as much as I will.

As a reminder, the only bit we haven’t seen yet from the season’s opening montage is Dan Scott & Chris Keller armed & dangerous. What are those two up to? Will we find out tonight?

I am SO worried about everyone. About Nathan of course, that won’t go away until he is back in Haley’s arms. And when that moment finally happens it’ll take an elephant tranquilizer to settle me down. I am now also very worried about Chase. Did he kill Chuck’s dad? Obviously his Air Force career is over. What a mess. I am anxious to see how Clay moves forward with the knowledge that Logan is his son. Surely Quinn will be 100% supportive. She’s that kind of girl. Right? And last but not least, Brooke. Xavier is SO CREEPY!!! And you have no idea how much I want Julian to kick his ASS. We’ve gotten to see Julian be sweet and sad and goofy and supportive but I don’t think we’ve ever gotten to see him go straight up Alpha Male Bad Ass. I’m READY!

  • Haley & Dan!! This is both crazy and awesome!! And I never thought I would ever say that!!
  • OMG Chuck’s mom is such a SLUNT!! Haley should probably push her and call her a bitch again.
  • I’m glad Clay isn’t trying to keep the truth about Logan from Quinn. Best to just come out and say it.
  • If I were Brooke & Julian I would not let those boys or each other out of my sight.
  • I don’t love Tara (and I really thought we were done with her) but that doesn’t mean I want Xavier the Creepy to do something to her.
  • I love Skills. He always puts a smile on my face.
  • QUINN!!!! I knew she would be awesome. She is a James girl after all! She is so sweet and supportive! Even though that is HUGE news to get from the man you love.
  • Chris Keller just keeps getting better and better. Hard to believe I ever disliked that guy.
  • Ok, remember when I said I didn’t want Xavier to do anything bad to Tara? I changed my mind. HATE HER!
  • WOW!! Haley looks AMAZING. If my husband was missing I would probably be wearing a dirty shirt and a greasy pony tail. Not Haley though! She is SMOKIN!
  • Waiting for Clay to remember Logan on his own does not seem like the best idea ever. That doctor should probably lose his license or something.
  • Chase didn’t kill Chuck’s dad. So that’s good. His mom needs to sack up or pack up though.
  • This parole officer is making my list of people in Tree Hill I would like kick many times in the head. This list is getting longer every week.
  • Holy hot legs Haley James!! Just when I thought she couldn’t get any sexier! And even husband thinks that drug dealer looks skeevy.
  • Awww!! Julian is so cute with his film history lessons.
  • Logan has gotten even cuter now that we know he’s Clay’s son. He’s even giving husband the giggles.
  • Chris Keller gets extra cookies from me. LOVE HIM for talking to Chuck.
  • OMG poor Haley has that skeevy dick hanging all over her!! GROSS!! I would need SO MANY SHOTS to put up with that. And then a Purell shower. BLEURG!
  • GO DAN GO!!!! And again husband reminds me that I have switched to Team Dan and he was on it the whole time. I GET IT!! I WAS WRONG!! It never happens though so I get why he’s rubbing it in.
  • BJG is just blowing my mind with her hotness. I would switch teams for her. Oh Em Gee.
  • Chase is super hot in that uniform!! And I’m not even an Air Force girl! (GO NAVY!) Also, GO CHUCK!! I’m gonna cry!! Over Chase & Chuck!! WHO KNEW?? This damn show.
  • HALEY JAMES SCOTT!!! I AM DOING SO MUCH CLAPPING AND CHEERING AND TYPING IN ALL CAPS!!!!!
  • LOL at Dan’s remark about Deb’s clothes. And he’s gonna get that jerk to talk and we’re gonna get our Nathan back!!! I AM SO EXCITED I CAN HARDLY STAND IT!
  • I am going to have nightmares about Xavier. YIKES!! And where was Julian? Why was Brooke allowed to walk to the car by herself in the dark? HUH? I asked my husband if he would let me out of his sight if I was Brooke he said yes but only if I was heavily armed and promised to shoot first & ask questions later.
  • Clay is doing an amazing job explaining this to Logan. I am impressed. And sad for both of them.
  • Chris Keller, “They’ve weakened our nation today!” He is too much awesome.
  • That is probably not what Julian intended his sound stage for but I am all in favor.
  • OMG. OMG. OMG. Is he in the house? OMG!!! OMG OMG!!!!! I don’t know if I should cry or scream or WHAT? GAH!!!

I feel like this episode was just a great big pile of hold our breath and wring our hands moments, waiting  for when all of the ISH goes down over the next few weeks!!! Holy crap!!! VIP of the night goes to BJG as Mrs. Haley James Scott. Lady knocked my socks off.

Next week is the BAMF Trifecta of Dan, Julian & Chris Keller. THIS I cannot wait to see. Will it all end with the rescue of our favorite boy? And when will Xavier finally get what’s coming to him? And can we finally be done with Tara now? She is also on my kick many times in the head list. Wouldn’t mind if she took a ride in Dan Scott’s chair of pain. GRRRRRR!!!

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