One week since we all said goodbye to something that changed our lives, that filled our hearts, that moved us more than we ever thought it would.
And now that the last DVD has been released, we are at the end of the end.
No new promos or video clips or commentaries. No new episodes. No new Naley.
Just saying that out loud hurts my heart.
“I guess I just miss all of it. Does any of that make any sense?”
“Yeah, it makes all the sense in the world.”
In the finale we were gifted with new memories, fresh starts and a brand new kiss in the rain. So playful and stunning and real. It was everything.
This last week has been difficult, to say the least. And I know that I am not the only one who feels that way. I have had the privilege of talking with so many fans and friends over the last 7 days. On Twitter, Tumblr, Skype and email. There are so many of us in the same boat. In mourning. In denial. We are all hurting. Reflective, empty, melancholy.
So many of us have spent this last week with Blind Pilot, Gavin DeGraw and U2 on repeat. We have watched and shared more fan vids than I ever thought possible. We have started the series over from the start. Or have picked our favorite episodes to watch again with new eyes. We’ve found our favorite screen caps and GIFs on tumblr to reblog. And reblog. And reblog.
Most importantly, we have shared it with each other. We have shared every tear, every heart break, every soul burst. I have seen so many virtual hugs this week; we may have set a record. Too bad we were all too busy crying to keep count.
Today, our first Wednesday in months without our show, has been miserable for me to even think about. There was no “Happy OTH Wednesday” tweet. There is no new episode tonight to watch and recap. I will have no comments to read as I while away my sleepless night.
I feel burdened with the weight of this farewell. But I feel better knowing that there are so many carrying it with me. I think that it’s important that we take this experience with us moving forward. This sharing of the burden. Not just of THIS sadness, but of all of the sadness and difficulty life has yet to hand out. I think that’s the least we could take away from our show.
It has been said: time heals all wounds. And time will fix this one as well. We have to continue to support each other and comfort each other. No matter how long it takes. And in the future, we can remember this time, and lean on one another again.
Surely it will be a while before any of us can watch basketball or see purple flowers without feeling that pang. But that day will come.
“The hardest part of saying good-bye is having to do it again every single day.”
Much love to my OTH Family. Miss you already.